I was standing in my kitchen, washing what seemed like a mountain of dishes, and all of a sudden little white flakes started slowly drifting toward my window. I enthusiastically called for Tito and we ran outside.
I was standing outside, barefoot and freezing wondering what was so special about snow? There is certainly something about it. What, I have no idea.
I came inside, lit a fire (I have yet to figure out how to turn on my heat), put on a second pair of socks, another pair of sweatpants (over my flannel pajamas), put Tito in his sweater and we curled up in bed. I was so thankful to be warm, in a bed, under a bunch of covers, snuggled up with my dog. I took a deep breath, and started to think about my kids. Where are they? Are they warm? Who are they snuggling with? Have they eaten? Do they have a fire lit?
I have been teaching for a whopping four months. It feels like years. All I know is that in those four short months, I have created unmovable bonds with my students. They are my family, and I can confidently say, they have let me into their world... and I am honored. We mutually serve a purpose in each other's lives. We are excited to share things with one another... the typical, "Hey, Ms. Hall. Guess what!?!" After which follows anything from the most exciting news to something terribly devastating. Either way, my room is a place to share....for all of us.
Our newest addition to the classroom is an "Inspiration Wall". Day after day my students bring me pictures, cards, poems, song lyrics, and any other creation they pour themselves into.... "Ms. Hall. LOOK!" I was hanging them on my cabinets, folding them up and putting them in my wallet... some would be tucked safely in my desk, others displayed per an excited student's request. Eventually, the collection became so large and inspiring I pitched the idea of an "Inspiration Wall" to my kids. They walk in the room and can see each other's work. Most student's want their names removed, but you can see them glow when another student acknowledges their work. They are so impressed with each other! I am simply beside myself. My kids have really made my classroom theirs... and it is amazing. They compliment, encourage, and challenge each other. There is a healthy amount of peer pressure to do the right thing, or "HUSH, Ms. Hall is trying to talk!"
We are a family. We laugh, fight, cry, make mistakes, give each other a hard time, but we are in this together, nonetheless.
One of the most common questions I receive is, "Ms. Hall... why do you care so much?"I have yet to figure out how best to answer it. Most of the time I tell them simply that "I just do". I love them... that's it.
I keep it simple.
Around my rough patch in October I found myself starting to over-think just how close I should be getting to my kids. I wondered about boundaries, maintaining an appropriate relationship, not being too much of a friend, etc. As important as all of those things are, a lot of it simply isn't me. I am not going to sit there and overanalyze the feelings I have for my students and whether or not I should keep from them how much I care about them. Fact is, I don't really think much about it anymore. I tell my kids I love them, and they excitedly say, "We love you too, Ms. Hall". Nothing is weird, over-thought, or strained. It is just true, and honest.
For the longest time I couldn't get the resounding, "Your students don't need you to be their friend" out of my head. I know that, and I get it. But why does it have to be one or the other? Teacher or friend? What about a teacher who is foremost a teacher, but is also someone that a student can confidently say cares about them like a friend or family member would?
Maybe such a relationship isn't possible in every classroom situation, or with every group of kids, but it is working here and now... and it is glorious.
I am incredibly grateful for the way my students have let me into their world and how interested they are in being part of mine :) They say "ain't".... I say "do not".... they listen to the most hardcore rap I have ever heard, while I blast Irish folk music...
Through our differences, we have grown a tremendous mutual respect. One founded on love and trust. They are not the biggest fans of reading, but they'll do it for me, because they know I am not the biggest fan of the "Dougie" but I am willing to try it for them. :) It is give and take. I will not ask of my students something I am not willing to do in return for them, and they know it.
In school tomorrow I am sure my students and I will excitedly share with each other how we felt when we saw the snow fall. We will chat about the weekend, exchange hugs, then get down to business.... because after all, we have work to do.
Journal prompt for Monday: What is a true family?
Can't wait to read those responses!
